Bruce D Schneider's Blog

Once a Coach, Always a Coach

At iPEC, we believe that coaches should walk the talk. That means that they should live the process they espouse, and not just from time to time… as a lifestyle. We train people to BE coaches, not just to DO coaching.

Think about this: if you were a therapist and you walked into your video store and began a conversation with a familiar clerk, would you do therapy? Of course not. If you were a carpenter would you shore up the counters before you left? Not a chance. But if you were a Core Energy Coach (iPEC’s coaching system), you’d be a coach 24/7, and with everyone in your life. In other words, coaching, being a system that allows you to fully be who you are, forms a framework for every conversation or interaction you ever have.

After people take our training, I often hear them remark that they aren’t sure how they survived in their lives without the Core Energy Coaching training. The skills, tools, techniques, and methodology are great, but more important is the entire philosophical approach that grounds people in a way to see themselves, the world around them, and the people in their world.

I’ve been a therapist, consultant, mentor, sports coach, and more, and yet, all those were things I did. A coach is who I am. And a coach is who I will always be.

Need a Vacation?

I hope not. If you need a vacation then that means you’re tired, burned out, or overly stressed. Vacations should be something that brings you fun and change, not something that you need to decompress. In other words, you should want a vacation, but not need a vacation.

I just got back from Mexico. I had a wonderful time, and realized that many of the people there were in the same environment as I was, but in a different place, mentally. They NEEDED their vacation and needed it badly. It took them days to even begin to enjoy themselves, and I suspect that when they return to work, they’ll either say that their vacation wasn’t long enough, or, after a day or two of work, that they need another one.

If you don’t love what you do, then you will constantly be looking for ways to avoid doing it. If this is you, work with a coach to help you remove your stressors and fully enjoy your job. That way, when you go on vacation, you’ll enjoy it more thoroughly, and at the end of it maybe even look forward to getting back to work!

Conscious Choice: True Freedom and the Power it Holds

The subject of freedom seems to be an appropriate one for this Fourth of July holiday. After all, the freedom to make choices is one of the things that the founders of this country had in mind when they drafted the Declaration of Independence.  We are very fortunate indeed to live in a nation dedicated to maintaining our rights of “Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”

One of iPEC’s foundation principles states that “The greatest freedom is the freedom of choice.”  There is a great deal of power in knowing that you always have a choice – but most people don’t recognize all the options that they have. As coaches, we give the gift of freedom to others when we help them learn to make conscious choices – choices that are made without fear, doubt, and other catabolic energy.

This July 4th, take a moment to express your gratitude that you live in a country that allows you the freedom, and the right, to choose how you want to experience your life.

PS> Join us on July 17th in New York for the Power of Choice -- a transformational workshop that reveals the 7 Levels of Energy and exactly how they impact your choices! 

Living Like a King

Someone recently gave me a book about Eddie Feigner, who is known as the “King,” from the famous softball team, “The King and His Court.” Feigner was a great athlete, and his “Court” consisted of him as pitcher, and only 4 other players. They would consistently beat full teams of players and were quite entertaining in the process.

The book was not particularly well-written, and yet, for me, something about it was very emotional. This is the story of a boy who was given up for adoption at birth, and who struggled to make ends meet throughout his entire life. Ironically, he was at the top of his profession, but compared to baseball and other sports, fast-pitch softball wasn’t really recognized as equal to the others, and so, he received very little notoriety, even after he mastered his gift.

So in reading his story, it occurred to me that life’s masters are not just those who earn a great deal of money or recognition. And probably more often than not, they themselves don’t even recognize their full achievement and impact on others.

I saw the King and His Court in the 90’s. Eddie was in his 70’s, I think, and obviously past his prime. However, he still threw the ball nearly 100 miles per hour, and blew away all those who tried to hit against him. Eddie passed away a few years ago, leaving records that will probably remain unsurpassed. But most important to me was that he left me with the memory of someone who walked the talk and excelled in greatness. He didn’t just pitch. He was THE pitcher.

So whatever you do, do it with all you have, and regardless of what the masses think, let your actions be your success. Rest peacefully, Eddie.

Parents as Coaches

There are many differences between a parent armed with coaching skills vs. one who’s not. I’ll focus on three for now.

1)     Parents who know how to coach can communicate clearly with their children, that is, they can make sure that everyone is totally clear about what is being discussed, and what actions each person will take. Good communication skills also help parents avoid the “What did you do in school today?” – “Nothing” conversations so typical in many households.

2)     Parents can coach children through the disciplinary process, getting a buy-in on being responsible for their actions. Then, if the child breaks the agreed upon rules, parents can OBJECTIVELY respond, instead of emotionally react. This takes a lot of skill, but parents who learn the iPEC coaching process, even if it’s only from our initial Life Potentials Training, are well-equipped to be seen as the people responsible for enforcing an agreement, instead of being seen as parents who don’t care, are mean, and are policing their children.

3)     A third benefit of learning how to coach would be to help older children (at any age), develop strong plans for college, business, relationships, finance, and more. Coaching works well in families that do it well, and the results are extraordinary. Nothing brings parents a greater level of satisfaction than helping their children create plans that lead to success. And by doing it with the coach approach, those plans have more chance for success than with any other approach.

Again, that’s just three examples of many about why it’s beneficial for parents to develop not only coaching skills, but a coaching frame of mind.

Why is engagement the most important factor in life and business today?

Getting engaged, lately?

I've found that one of the biggest challenges to most people's level of enjoyment on the job or in a relationship is whether or not they are fully engaged in what they are doing. So many people are just going through the motions, particularly at work, to the point that they are in a state of "have to" instead of "want to." The result? A disconnection between who they are and what they do.

Disengagement from any aspect of life causes stress, at best, or at the extreme, apathy. This challenge is so prevalent that many studies cite disengagement at work as THE top block to productivity and the main cause for attrition.

So how do you get engaged? Well, for starters, I've always found that my clients felt more engaged when they knew that their contribution was appreciated and meant something. Instead of guessing, I've requested that people actually ask how they are doing. Few people offer accolades without prompting, and unfortunately, instead of this, most people are quicker to focus on and point out what's wrong. So if you don't ask, you may never get what you are looking for to feel valued and know what you are doing matters.

That said, ultimately, you value doesn't need to be given to you by others. Recognize that whatever you do is your choice, and how you do it is also your choice. Give fully on the job, and at home, and you'll be able to pat yourself on the back and feel great about your contribution.

Why are Coaching Skills Key to a Leader’s Success In Today’s World?

In a way, it's funny, that the most important aspect of leadership is great communication, and it's the least practiced. Leaders, especially those in organizations, are usually experts at their product or service, but lack the true ability to motivate and inspire others to greatness. That lack of ability doesn't come from a lack of desire, but a lack of coaching skills.

Coaching helps leaders inspire and motivate others in a variety of ways, including: communicating effectively and efficiently, meaning, clearly getting across their message in the shortest period of time; increasing buy-in for a particular project, task, or goal; breaking resistance; creating accountability and the desire to report successes, not problems; developing rapport and relationships; helping to create plans that make sense for all participants; and much, much, more.

And it's not just the coaching skills that are needed, but the framework, philosophy, and structure behind the skills.

Without making this too much of a commercial, that's why a lot of leaders are now participating in iPEC's Life Potential's Training. This course gives them the foundation not just to coach, but to BE a coach, which makes them even more effective in what they do and how they do it. What's interesting to me is not just that many leaders are taking this training, but that these people are finally realizing the gap between where they are and where they want to be. It’s very exciting to know that so many people are looking to improve their personal and professional lives, and believe that coaching is a great way to do that.

The original question was related to success, and I want to say something about that: Success is defined by each person, and regardless of the definition, taking a coach-approach at on the job or in the house will ensure that your success is imminent.

                                          

iPEC Coaching
Bruce D Schneider, Founder
www.IPECcoaching.com

We all lead, either by choice or default.The question isn't whether or not you are a leader, it's how well you lead. Energy Leadership: Transforming Your Workplace and Your Life From the Core.

Why did you create iPEC?

People often ask me why I founded the iPEC organization, and my answer usually surprises them, as I had no intention of creating a coaching school. In fact, all I wanted was a group of coaches to help me continue my mission of raising world consciousness, one person at a time.

Like many entrepreneurs, I knew that I couldn’t and shouldn't try to do everything and be everything to everyone. I knew that I had an amazing coaching process (the Core Energy Coaching process), that was getting tremendous success for clients, much better than the successes I was able to help people get through therapy, consulting, or mentoring. It took me decades to create the Core Energy Coaching process, and knowing that I had something very, very special, I wanted to expand it, and yet, I was only one person.

So my idea was to send prospective coaches to, at that time, one of the few coach training programs available, and then, I'd add my process to the "basics" and move forward with my dream team--a powerful coaching group.

To make a very long story short, all my research told me none of the existing training programs met my standards. Those school's "basics" were not nearly enough, and so even though I originally planned to augment an existing training for those I wanted to become part of my team, I soon realized that 90% of what I wanted them to learn was missing. So I decided to formalize my system and create iPEC as a coach training program. That was about 10 years ago, and, as most people now know, iPEC is recognized as one of, if not, the world's most prestigious coaching programs.

iPEC took on a life of its own and exploded around the country, not really allowing me the time to develop the group I wanted. Since graduating thousands of coaches, my initial dream has come as least partially true, though, as so many gifted people from all walks of life are now using the Core Energy Coaching process to share their unique gifts and make a huge difference in the world on their own. However, recently, we've come full circle, as we’re now getting a lot of work for graduates, which is what I had intended from the beginning.

Even though we train people to know everything they need to know to run a successful coaching business on their own, my current goal is still the same as my original goal - to work directly with hundreds of iPEC coaches as partners; to share, grow, and lead people to greatness and higher consciousness… in the process.

Memorial Day, a time to remember the past and look forward to the future.

These days, I'm wondering how many people actually know the meaning behind Memorial Day. Perhaps to some, the significance of it is that they get a day off from work. But the day has deep meaning in remembering the efforts of the veterans who fought for a cause so that we can live the way we choose.

Would you die for the cause you believe in? By choice or by draft, many have, and we really need to thank them for fighting for the cause of freedom. But what else? Is the purpose of this holiday limited to remembering and honoring the past? I don't believe so. I think that we can all look at our "causes," the things we believe in with heart and soul, and see these past heroes as a reminder to move forward, even in the face of danger.

The path to the future isn't already paved for you in the forest; it's often painstakingly carved out by each of us, one step at a time. Unlike our veterans, perhaps you don't have to risk your life to create one worth living, but then again, without taking positive action to create the life you want, you'll probably just follow someone else's path at best, or sit around and wait for a fulfilling life to come to you.

This Memorial Day offers you the opportunity to reflect, and also to proactively step forward towards the life you want. We are all soldiers in life, and to create the future you desire, it takes soldiering: with passion, courage, and fortitude.

Bad Mood? Great Opportunity!

Someone wrote me this week to ask me how he could get out of a bad mood. First of all, it’s important to recognize that “good” and “bad” are judgments, and that, in fact, all of life’s experiences are valuable and offer us insights and lessons.

So next time you’re in a “bad” mood, try “owning” the discontent, meaning, be OK with the way you're feeling and don’t have the need to change it right away. Feelings are our creation, and our choice. When you realize that you chose to be upset, then you can live with that decision until you are ready to choose something else.

Ask yourself what caused your mood, and explore what you can learn from it.

Then, once you are ready, realize what you are gaining from being upset is not worth the cost, and so, either speak about your upset with someone, or write a journal entry about it, or choose another way of processing that helps you put it behind you and move on.